SELF-LOVE
Part 1 of a 4 Part Study on self-worth
1. What does the term "self-love" mean to you?
2. Is the statement, "What you don't know, won't hurt you,"
true?
ASSUMPTION 1: God wants each of us to gain understanding.
There is understanding of God, understanding of others, and
understanding ourselves.
ASSURANCE 1: "Listen, my sons, to a father's instructions;
pay attention and gain understanding. I give you sound
learning, so do not forsake my teaching. When I was a boy in
my father's house, still tender, and an only son of my
mother, he taught me and said, "Lay hold of my words with all
your heart; keep my commandments and you will live. Get
wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or swerve
from them. Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you;
love her and she will watch over you. Wisdom is supreme;
therefore get wisdom. Though it cost you all you have, get
understanding. PROVERBS 4:1-7
APPLICATION 1: God tells us that wisdom is the supreme
thing. He wants us to get wisdom. And with all of our
getting, whatever it costs, we should get understanding.
ASSUMPTION 2: The word psychology has been in conflict in
the religious world for some time. Some ministers who were
against it, use it on their own congergations to get them to
do what he wants them to do.
Some Christians even think psychology is the work of the
devil. You will find that most things that are the work of
the devil are simply good things which have been misused.
Taking the good thing and making it into something that is
evil does not make it's original form evil.
Psychology may fall into this category. Misused
psychology is wrong. The word psychology is made from two
root words. The word "psyche" which means mind and the word
"oloy" which means "the study of." So psychology is the study
of the mind, or the study of individual human bahavior!
There is nothing wrong with the study of the mind
itself. It can be a good thing.
ANALOGY 2: When a mother gives the baby a bath, she throws
out the dirty bath water. But she dosen't throw out the baby
with it. She keeps the good and gets rid of the part that is
no longer useful.
APPLICATION 2: The study of individual human behavior can
be a good thing. It can be used to a good end and in a good
way. The Word of God points out in many places that we must
know how to behave. We must live our lives in a particular
way. In order to do that, we need to understand ourselves.
ASSUMPTION 3: The book of Proverbs could be considered
somewhat of a psychology book. It deals with the way human
beings behave. It shows the kind of human behavior God
condones. It shows certain behavior patterns which will lead
to righteousness if you follow them.
ANALOGY 3: One professor of a well known Bible College
said that he could sum up the word psychology in one word to
put it into the college vernacular. It was found in the book
of Proverbs. THe word was understanding.
ASSUMPTION 4: Man is made up of three parts. Man is spirit,
soul and body. Of course, that applies to women too. The word
man is used to refer to mankind.
Your spirit is the real you. It is the inner man. The
soul is made up of the mind, will and emotions. Your body is
the part you recognize very quickly. It is the outer shell.
The most important part of man is the spirit. In dealing
with our topic, SELF-LOVE, we are going to deal mostly with
the soul of man. In that, we do not intend to exhault the
soul above the spirit. The soul is acutally the means through
which we express many things that are within our spirits. We
express the spirit through the will and through the emotions.
If we get our soul life in proper perspective, we will be
able to express many things from our spirits to God and those
around us.
ACTIVITY: Take a sheet of paper and make two coloumns. On
one side write down five (5) of your bad points. On the other
side, write down five (5) of your good points.
How many strong points were you able to fill in? How
many weak points?
ASSURANCE 4: "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me.
You know me when I sit down and when I rise; you precieve my
thoughts from afar. You discerne my going out and my lying
down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on
my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. You hem me in,
behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. For you
created my innermost being; you knit me together in my
mother's womb."
Psalm 139:1-5, 13
APPLICATION 4: We all have weanknesses. But I don't think
God wants us to capitalize on them. We should have the proper
outlook and be able to see the strenghts God has given us,
too. God has put some good things in our lives. Since He knit
us together, we have every reason to feel confident that He
"wove" something potentially goon into us.
ASSUMPTION 5: Did you write "Jesus" in the good column of
your life? He is one of the good things about you. As a
result of Jesus being a part of your life, you will find the
door open to a lot more good areas in which you can gain
strength through His help.
We all need to have the right understanding of ourselves
in the sight of God. But there is a difference between being
confident and cocky.
WE NEED TO FIND THE BALANCE BETWEEN THE TWO
ANALOGY 5: God dosen't want us towalk around saying, "I am
God's gift to the church."
Some people go around thinking, "I am so full of faults.
I'm just the scum of the earth. It isn't right for me to even
go to church. I'm not worthy."
APPLICATION 5: These are two extremes. A good attitude
would be somewhere in the middle. We need to find a balance
between the two. God dosen't want us to be cocky. But He
wants us to see our potential in Him. God wants us to
recognize the strenght of Jesus Christ working within us. He
wants to see that as we work with Him, the Holy Spirit can
help us overcome these bad points. With the help of God, we
can utilize our strong points - move forward in Him and
accomplish things for the Kingdom of God.
ASSURANCE 5: "But the people who know their God will be
strong and do exploits."
Daniel 11:32
ASSUMPTION 6: It is important that we first recognize our
strengths. We can go forward in God more effectively when we
recognize the strengths He has given us.
ANALOGY 6: One day James was driving down a country road
when his car sputtered to a halt. It was out of gas. He
desperately searched through his billfold and glove box for
some money - even some change. At last he began the walk to
a country house about a mile down the road - his pockets
completely empty. There was nothing to do but call someone
who was thrity miles away.
It was a long wait, but at last his father showed up
with a gas can. They worked together, got the car running.
And the boy went on his way. As he drove fdown the street
toward his destination, he recalled that he had hidden a 20
dollar bill in the secret compartment of his billfold.
APPLICATION 6: The money hidden away did not help the
fellow who didn't realize it was there. The same is true with
us. We must realize what we are - what we have - what we are
all about. We need to b e able to see the good things God has
given us. We need to see the strengths and abilities God has
granted us through rebirth and through the Holy Spirit's work
inour lives. Once we do recognize them we can use them to the
glory of God. First we need to understand the strengths of
our lives.
ASSUMPTION 7: Let's get an understanding of the term "self-
love." We have all heard some unpleasant things about self-
love. We've heard taht it is wrong.
ANALOGY 7: One fellow went through several years of his
life grossly confused about the term self-love because he had
read so many magazine articles in religious publications
saying that it was ungodly.
For a long time, he really backed off his view that we
should all have a good feeling of self-worth simply because
God created us in His image. It was some time, before he
made a thorough study of the scriptures himself. When he did,
the teachings of Paul and Jesus revealed that God wants us to
recognize ourselves as worthwhile - as something precious in
His sight.
APPLICATION 7: One problem is that the tern "self-love" is
often mistaken for selfishness. People have used the words
interchageably for so long that it has brought some
confusion. We are using the term self-love to mean self-
esteem. Self-love and selfishness, as they are used in this
Bible Study do not mean the same thing. Selfishness is being
wraapped up in self rather than Jesus. Selfishness is having
everything you want, when you want it, the way you want it.
The basis for all sin is slefishness. But self-love in this
lesson is the self-worth everyone must feel in order to reach
out to others.
THE THREE CHARACTERISTICS OF LOVE
ASSUMPTION 8: There are three characteristics found in
self-love. They are 1)acceptance 2)respect and
3)understanding.
ANALOGY 8: You would expect someone who says they love you
to accept you for who you are. If acceptance isn't there,
love is a fraud.
You would also expect someone who says they love you to
respect you.
Understanding is an essential quality of love. If
someone says he loves you, he should try and recognize your
unique qualities as well as accepting your peculiarities. He
shouldn't pass you off as dumb the first time you do
something differently that he would.
APPLICATION 8: If you really love someone you are going to
show respect and concern for that person. True love will
involve the three characteristics which we've mentioned:
Accpetance; Respect; and Understanding.
ASK AND ANSWER:
1. Do you think God feels that it's vital for us to have
understanding? Why or why not?
2. How do you think the three characteristics of God apply
to self-love?
SELF-LOVE
Part 3 of a 4 part Bible Study on Self-Worth
ASK AND ANSWER
1. Tell what the "fatal grasshopper syndrome" is and the
misconceptions that result from it.
2. What are the three aspects of love?
A. The four basic temperaments chart:
Each characteristic mentioned OUTSIDE the circle represents a
weakness of that temperament type. INSIDE the circle the
weaknesses are listed. The chart will help you not to get lost.
B. Occupation Lists:
A list of occupations for each temperament has been included.
Keep in mind that this list is very general.
ASSUMPTION 1: In order to go deeper into the subject "Self-Love"
we need to get a basic definition of some of the terms used in
this series. The terms we need to define are: Temperament;
Character; Personality.
Your temperament is a set of traits which you were born with.
When a child is born, he seems to already have a personality. He
really doesn't. It just seems that way because he has his own
individual temperament.
Your character is the expression of the real you. Your
character grows with experience. Think of it in the way your body
grown when you get exercise. You gain stamina when you exercise
regularly. You become more knowledgeable when you exercise your
mind. When your spirit gets exercise, you develop character or in
other words, spiritual stamina. God is building character in you
right now.
Temperament is the inborn traits. Personality is the outward
expression of the inward you. Your personality is something that
grows and develops. Sometimes your personality can be used to
cover-up your character.
To better understand yourself, you should get an
understanding of the four basic temperaments.
1. Sanguine
2. Choleric
3. Melancholy
4. Phlegmatic
This breakdown of personality types was originated in 400
B.C. by Hippocrates. Perhaps you may be more familiar with the
breakdowns as introverts and extroverts. The extroverts are those
people who are outgoing. The introverts are those who are more
quiet and laid back. We will get an even better understanding of
personality types by breaking them down into the four groups. In
each group, we will get a good idea of the strong and weak points
of each temperament. You can see by looking at the chart that it
is divided into four areas. Each of these is one of the
temperament types. On the inside of the circle, the weaknesses of
the temperaments are listed.
The book, "Spirit Controlled Temperament" by Tim LaHaye will
help you get a greater understanding of the subject "Self-Love: or
self-understanding. Many of the things which will be presented
here were derived from that book.
TO UNDERSTAND YOURSELF
We are going over these personality types to help you get a
better understanding of yourself. Whatever you do, don't take this
chart and start psyching out the person next to you. You shouldn't
try to figure out other people. It's here to help YOU with YOUR
understanding of YOURSELF. As you begin to better understand
yourself, understanding other people will fall into place.
As you look at each of these personalities, you will find
that you are predominantly one type. But you can be all four. You
can have some of the good and bad points from each personality
type. Still, one personality type will be predominate.
In most cases, people will have a predominate and a sub-
dominate temperament type. Different people will be different
proportions. The main reason for studying these types is so that
you have a better understanding of who you are.
DEFINITION OF A SANGUINE TEMPERAMENT
THE SANGUINE Personality is warm, lively, outgoing, the
person who enjoys life. He/she is very receptive by nature. Their
feelings seem to predominate their way of life. They have the
capacity to enjoy themselves wherever they are. They are the "Life
of the Party." At a party, the sanguine is the loud guy over in
the corner who always has 150,000 stories which he dramatizes
enthusiastically. They never lack for friends, or at a loss for
words. If the Sanguine gets into a tight spot and can't think of
anything else, he/she will talk their way out, or at least talk
a lot.
Usually the Sanguines will speak before they think about what
they should say. They put their mouth in gear before their brain
gets started. Very free wheeling. Often the Sanguine person
becomes the envy of the more timid temperament types. When the
Sanguine comes into a place, he/she is the noisy type - coming on
loud and strong. People who don't know them often wonder who they
are and why are they like that. Those who know the Sanguine just
stand around and say, "That's just the way he/she is." They go
about their business and don't let it bother them.
The world has been enriched by the cheerful sanguine people
who usually make good salesmen, hospital workers, teachers,
conversationlists, actors, public speakers, and occasionally, a
sanguine makes a good leader.
WEAK POINTS OF THE SANGUINE TEMPERAMENT
The weaknesses of the sanguine temperament are: they are weak
willed, unstable, undisciplined, restless, undependable, and very
caught up with themselves. They tend to talk a lot about their
accomplishments - majoring on the good things they have done
whether anyone wants to hear about it or not. They are loud and
exaggerate. They tend to be fearful people.
DEFINITION OF THE CHOLERIC TEMPERAMENT
He is hot, quick, active, practical and very strong willed.
He knows where he is going. He is decisive and opinionated. He is
the type who thrives on activity. He wants to be doing something.
One good thing you can say is that he knows where he is going and
he is planning how to get there.
A Choleric is not the type who will allow himself to be
hindered by what other people think about him. He has his sight
set on the goal before him. The choleric is going to get there.
A choleric is the type of person who might run over others.
His moral principles will determine that. If he doesn't have
strong moral principles, he is likely to run over anything and
everything in his path in order to reach his goal.
The choleric is capable of making sound, instant decisions.
He is not given to indecisiveness. He is good at planning
worthwhile and long range projects - usually, he is not hindered
by adversity. The choleric is not sympathetic with others. He
doesn't usually show emotion openly. Unlike the sanguine who
blunders his love and compassion everywhere, the choleric will not
freely spread his love. He doesn't like the open show of emotion.
The choleric is quick to recognize opportunity and diagnosing
the best way to use it. The choleric can be domineering and bossy.
He can use people. A choleric's attitude is self-sufficient and
independent. Choleric's make the world's greatest leaders. They
are good executives, idea men and produces. They can also become
dictators and criminals. Like the sanguine temperament, the
choleric is an extrovert, but not as extreme.
WEAK POINTS OF THE CHOLERIC TEMPERAMENT
Choleric people are strong willed, determined, independent,
optimistic, productive and decisive. They are very confident
leaders. But they can be angry, cruel, sarcastic, domineering,
inconsiderate, proud, self-sufficient, unemotional and crafty.
DEFINITION OF A MELANCHOLY TEMPERAMENT
The melancholy personality is an introvert. Tim LaHaye says
in his book that this personality can be the richest of all. The
melancholy person is very analytical, self-sacrificing, gifted and
a perfectionist. He has a very sensitive emotional nature. He is
very introverted and given to moodiness.
Of all the temperaments, melancholy will be the most loyal
friend. The melancholy personality is basically given to suspicion
when others shower him with attention and affection. He has an
exceptional analytical ability. He is given to personal sacrifice.
Because of his great gifts and ability, the melancholy can become
a great artist. But because of his moodiness, he might go to bed
absolutely ecstatic about his accomplishment and awake the next
morning depressed about it. He is given to a variety of moods.
No other temperament has so much natural potential when
energized by the Spirit of God as the melancholy temperament has.
The melancholy is genius-prone.
Melancholy persons become artists, musicians, inventors,
philosophers, educators, and theoriticians. Many outstanding men
of the Bible were predominantly melancholy.
THE STRENGTHS of the melancholy personality are that they are
gifted, analytical, sensitive, perfectionists, aesthetic (lovers
of beauty), idealistic, loyal, and self-sacrificing.
WEAKNESSES OF THE MELANCHOLY TEMPERAMENT
The melancholy temperament can be self-centered, moody,
negative, theoretical, impractical, unsociable, critical,
revengeful and rigid.
DEFINITION OF THE PHLEGMATIC TEMPERAMENT
The phlegmatic can be pictured like the slow guy strutting
down the street. If a bomb went off in his back pocket, he'd
slowly turn his head both ways and say very slowly, "what was
that?" and he'd just keep on walking.
Phlegmatics are calm, cool, easy going and well balanced.
They just take life as it comes. They have a very high boiling
point. You almost have to run over them with a truck in order to
make them angry. They are very consistent people. They are not
very excitable people.
Phlegmatics generally have a good mind - are able to retain
what they hear. The phlegmatic is an extreme introvert. You have
to be careful in approaching him. There is danger of coming on too
strong.
Phlegmatics are life's spectators. It's always, "Somebody
else ought to do this or that." They go about their business
without doing anything about anything.
The phlegmatic is a born peacemaker. The world has been
greatly benefited by phlegmatic people because of their easy going
nature. They make good diplomats, accountants, teachers, leaders
and scientists. They are especially good at working things out
which involve meticulous detail.
The STRONG POINTS OF THE PHLEGMATIC are they are calm, easy
going, dependable, efficient, conservative, practical, with
leadership traits, diplomatic, humorous.
WEAK POINTS OF THE PHLEGMATIC TEMPERAMENT
Phlegmatics can be stingy, fearful, indecisive. They are
spectators, self-protective and definitely unmotivated.
ALL THE GOOD POINTS TOGETHER
If you were to take all the good points of all the
temperaments and put them together, you would have the personality
and temperament of Jesus Christ. He is all the strengths of each
one.
SANGUINE
OCCUPATIONS
(General)
Salesman
Actors
Entertainers
Preachers
Master of Ceremonies
Auctioneers
Leaders (sometimes)
(Sanguine-Choleric)
People Oriented fields
Sports enthusiast
Starts in sales or promotion and ends up as manager
Financially successful (if.....)
Loved by his family (if.....)
(Sanguine-Phlegmatic)
Easiest person to like;
"Nicest guy I ever fired."
(Sanguine-Melancholy)
Doctor-Best bedside manner
Instructor, teacher, college professor (fantastic)
most popular on campus
The following fields are open to almost any Sanguine
1. Public Speaking
2. Fine Arts
3. Acting
4. Music
MELANCHOLY
OCCUPATIONS
(General)
Artists
Musicians
Inventors
Philosophers
Professors
Writers
Architects
Mathematician
Scientist
Composer
Orchestra Leader
Theologian
Diagnostic Medicine
Plumbers
Mechanics
Bricklayers
(Melancholy-Sanguine)
Actors
opera Stars
Country-Western Singers
(Melancholy-Choleric)
Attorney
Doctor
(Melancholy-Phlegmatic)
Scholars
Medicine
Pharmacy
Dentistry
Architect
Decorating
Literature
Theology
CHOLERIC
OCCUPATIONS
(General)
Leaders
Producers
Builders
Sales
Sports
Teaching
Dictators
Criminals
(Choleric-Sanguine)
Attorney
Fund-raising
Pastor & Administrator
Politician
Debater
Teacher (good communicator)
(Choleric-Melancholy)
Architect
Plant Superintendent
Military Leaders
Defense Attorney
Football Coaches
Politicians
PHLEGMATIC
OCCUPATIONS
(General) (Phlegmatic-Melancholy)
School Teachers Technician
Librarians Photography
College Department Heads Printing
Diplomats Inventor
Analysis
(Phlegmatic-Sanguine) Layout Work
Administrator Advertising
College Registrar Dentistry
Accountants Watch Making
Mechanics Painting
Funeral Directors Glassblowing
Working Scientist Finish Carpentry
Engineer Wallpaper Hanging
Statistician (any detail work)
Radio Announcer
Counselor
Visitation Minister
Veterinarian
Farmer
Bricklayer
Construction Worker
(Phlegmatic-Choleric)
Group Leader
Foreman
Executive Vice-President
Accountant
Educator
Planner
Construction Worker
SANGUINE - STRENGTHS WEAKNESSES
Talkative Weak-willed
Outdoing Unstable
Enthusiastic Undisciplined
Warm Disorganized
Friendly Restless
Responsive Undependable
Compassionate Unproductive
Carefree Egocentric
Generous Exaggerates
Optimistic Obnoxious-loud
Enjoyable Fearful-insecure
Charisma Lust
Talkative Forgetful
CHOLERIC - STRENGTHS WEAKNESSES
Strong-willed Cold
Determined Unsympathetic
Independent Insensitive
Optimistic Inconsiderate
Practical Hostile-angry
Productive Sarcastic
Decisive Self-suffcient
Leader Proud
Visionary Unforgiving
Courageous Domineering
Opinionated-prejudiced Confident
Unemotional
Crafty
Stubborn
Impetuous
MELANCHOLY - STRENGTHS WEAKNESSES
Self-centered
Moody
Aesthetic Negative
Gifted Rigid & Legalistic
Analytical Theoretical
Sensitive Impractical
Perfectionist Touchy
Conscientious Unsociable
Idealistic Critical
Loyal Persecution-prone
Self-sacrificing Revengeful
Self-disciplined Suspicious & gloomy
PHLEGMATIC - STRENGTHS WEAKNESSES
Calm Stingy
Easy-going Fearful
Dependable Indecisive
Efficient Spectator
Practical Self-protective
Conservative Selfish
Diplomat Unmotivated
Organized Stubborn
Quiet
Reluctant Leader
Dry Humor
Witty
Likeable
SELF-LOVE
Part 4 of a 4 part Bible Study on Self-worth
ASK AND ANSWER:
1. Name each of the four temperaments and note two strengths and
two weaknesses of each.
2. Why should we understand ourselves?
ASSUMPTION 1: No matter which is your predominate temperament,
God wants you to love, understand and accept yourself. He willwork
in your life by the Holy Spirit to change you where it is needed.
No one temperament is better than the other. If you are a
sanguine, don't feel that God could only use a melancholy.
Phlegmatics shouldn't want to be Choleric's. Each of you should
accept the temperament that you have been blessed with. God uses
all kinds to do His work.
Outside Jesus Christ, the four major characters were each a
different temperament. Let's examine them.
ANALOGY 1: Peter was a sanguine from the outset. He was the
outgoing, loveable apostle - never a doubt to what he was
thinking. The reason for that, is he didn't think anything long
enough. He said it before he was half way through the thought.
On the Mount of Transfiguration, Peter,James, and John stand
as Jesus is suddenly transfigured. Moses and Elijah appear.
Peter doesn't know what to do, so what DOES he do? He talks.
"Well, Jesus, I think what we'll do is make three tents. We'll
make one for you, one for Moses and one for Elijah. We'll put
James and Moses in one, Elijah and John can get in one, and you
and I can have one. We can stay here and you can keep on getting
transfigured."
Then a cloud descends upon them. God speaks to Peter. "This
is my beloved Son. HEAR YE HIM!"
In other words, that means, "Shut up Peter and listen." That
was Peter the sanguine. When he didn't know what else to do, he
just started talking. You never have to wonder what PEter is
thinking. He always says it.
God worked in Peter's life. By the time Peter gets past
Pentecost, he has become a dynamic leader. He has quit talking so
much. He has become a spirit-controlled sanguine.
APPLICATION 1: No matter what the temperament, God can work
in our lives. That is the job of the Holy Spirit. He works in us
to make us what we are not. He does the improvements.
ASSUMPTION 2: Paul was a choleric. God worked in his life.
ANALOGY 2: Paul was strong-willed. In fact, before his encounter
with Jesus Christ on the Damascus Road, you can see the cruelty
with which he persecuted Christians. He was driven by religion to
destroy others. He wanted to kill those who had a relationship
with Jesus Christ.
Later in his life, we find that Paul is an example to the
believers. His choleric temperament comes under control. God works
in his life to make Paul into the image of Christ - one who is
willing to suffer all things for the sake of the gospel.
APPLICATION 2: Paul's choleric determination made him the kind
of leader God could use. Few people have ever pursued a goal with
the determination with which he (Paul) persisted. He knew where he
wanted to go and he went. But he became more like Jesus through
the years. The Holy Spirit worked in his life.
ASSUMPTION 3: Moses was a melancholy. God changed him in all the
necessary ways and used his temperament.
ANALOGY 3: Moses - the genius. Analytical, gifted, loyal Moses
was led by God through the wilderness and died there after seeing
the promised land. He was totally dedicated to God. A sensitive
man who was given to perfection, writing the first five books of
the Bible by the inspiration of God, always maintaining the strong
bond of loyalty to God - in every situation.
In the first part of his life, Moses was convinced of his
greatness. God had to send him to the back side of the desert to
show him that he wasn't so hot. After that lesson, God had to
teach him that God was everything. In all of this, Moses became
the most useable men by the work of the Holy Spirit in his life.
APPLICATION 3: We'd be safe saying that God chose Moses because
he did have the melancholy temperament. God knew that he could
trust him. Melancholy people are loyal. We see this trait in
Moses.
With all that he had going for him, we can see by reviewing
Moses' life, that God had to work and teach him by the Holy Spirit
in order to make him the spirit-controlled melancholy God needed
in a man who would lead His people.
ASSUMPTION 4: By looking into the Old Testament and examining
the life of Abraham, we find that Abraham was a phlegmatic.
ANALOGY 4: Abraham, easy going, seems to strut through the Old
Testament. He moves along down the road, not knowing where he is
going. But he is perfectly satisfied to go. In fact, he doesn't
seem to really care. He just slowly and calmly moves along.
Abraham was so unmotivated that it didn't seem to ripple him
when the king ripped off his wife. His wife was in danger of
getting in to sexual sin. Meanwhile Abraham is outside tending
sheep. Ho hum!
The king had to send a messenger to tell him that God had
sent a dream. He told Abraham to take his wife and leave town.
So, Abraham moves on. He slowly, calmly travels through the
scriptures.
APPLICATION 4: It seems that Gos chose Abraham because he was
phlegmatic. Who else is going to spend their life on a long
journey to who knows where -not a choleric. That is for sure. Yet
God had to work in Abraham's life by the Holy Spirit. He had to
change Abraham because he had some of the phlegmatic
characteristics that worked against the work of God. All of his
life, God worked in Abraham.
AN ENDING STATEMENT: You are one of the four temperaments which
were mentioned. You may feel like you are the fifth temperament -
confusion. But, you're not. You are in there somewhere. The main
thing is that you understand that God made you that way. If you
are a fun-loving sanguine, that's okay. God made you that way. If
you're a determined choleric, an easy-going phlegmatic, a gifted
melancholy - whatever you are, God made you that way. He made you
that way for a reason. He has a place for you. God put Moses in
the place where He did because of the way Moses was. He will do
the same for you. He has put you and will put you where you need
to be because of the way you are.
We all need to realize that each of us the temperament we
have - and that God made us. We differ from eachother. But God
made the one who is different from us also. God made you a certain
way. He has given you the strengths and weaknesses you have. Each
of us can overcome those weaknesses with the help of God. The Holy
Spirit is going to work in your life and mine, just like He worked
in the lives of Moses and Paul and Abraham and Peter. God is at
work in us.
We don't have to be critics of ourselves. The Holy Spirit is
going to do the necessary work of changing us as we continue to
walk with Jesus.
No matter what personality type you are, God has a dynamic,
meaningful positionfor you in His kingdom. We have seen in this
study that God can use people of every temperament. He used the
sanguine, the phlegmatic, the choleric and the melancholy. Your
life is not out the window because you are not perfect. In fact,
your life is straight ahead. No matter what temperament you are,
you are not hindered by God. He will work in your life to give you
all that you need to fulfill your position in Him. All you need to
do is remain faithful to Him. God can conquer your weaknesses.
Remember:
I'M ME AND THAT'S OKAY BECAUSE GOD DON'T MAKE NO JUNK!
PART 2 OF A 4 PART STUDY ON
SELF-LOVE
ASK AND ANSWER:
1. Does a lack of self-love hurt us? Explain
2. Does God want us to see any good in ourselves? Explain.
ASSUMPTION 1: The last lesson discussed the two terms
selfishness and self-love. One reason it is difficult to use
the two terms together is that they seem to contradict each
other. Using the two words together can lead to an unclear
definition. Certainly they can't be used interchageably in
the way some people use them. That will lead to confusion.
One reason we have had the problem if using these two
words interchageably is that they both have the word "self"
out front. It would help to keep a clear understanding of the
positive side of self-love by thinking of it as self-esteem.
Self-love. or self-esteem is accepting yourself the way God
made you. It has the characteristics of of respect,
understanding and acceptance. Applied ton one's self that
would mean self-respect, understanding of one's self, and
self acceptance.
ASSURANCE 1: "For we are God's workmanship, created in
Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance
for us to do."
Ephesians 2:10
APPLICATION 1: Referring bvack to a scripture in Psalm 139,
God knit us together in our mother's womb. He knew what we
were before we did. We are God's workmanship. You and I are
God's workmanship. He made you with the type of character you
have. You are the way you are partly because of God's
original design. To really be what you should be in God, you
must accept what He has made you to be. you need to have a
healthy respect for yourself as God's creation. That is a
logical conclusion from the scripture.
ASSUMPTION 2: Another thing we need to have is an
understanding of ourselves. We can't love ourselves without
having any understanding. understanding is part of love. And
we all need it in order to tolerate things about ourselves.
ASSURANCE 2: "Love the Lord thy God with all your soul and
with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is
this; Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment
greater than these."
Mark 12:30-31
ANALOGY 2: Let's say your neighbor Fred and I decide that
we are going to trucks together. I am going to his house
because we both got new trucks for Christmas. We decide to
play outside with our new trucks. The first thing he does is
run his new truck into a brick wall. Fred goes after it and
does it again.
"Look!" he says, "I can ride my dump truck!" He puts his
foot in the back and slides down the sidewalk with it. The
truck keeps getting flatter and flatter. In no time, it is
really shabby looking. "Let's see how flat my truck can get,"
says Fred. He puts the toy under the back wheel of his
father's pick-up. After his dad backs out of the drive way,
there is a flat piece of metal left on the pavement which
dosen't even resemble a truck.
Right away, Fred picks up what is left of the truck and
runs to the alley. He throws the flat piece of metal at some
cats. Soon, cats are scurrying all over the neighborhood with
Fred in hot pursuit.
After that episode, Fred takes the brightly colored
metal to the bayou. He wants to see how many times it will
skim over the water. he give it a throw and it beigns to sink
into never never land.
Afterwards, he looks up with a gleam in his eye and
says, "Aww, that was fun. Now let's play with your truck."
I take one look at him, grab my truck and run.
APPLICATION 2: Why didn't I want him to touch my truck? He
had no understanding of how the truck should be used. He
wasn't considering the trucks limitations. He abused the
truck rather than recognizing what it was and what it did.
If Fred had that attitude toward his own truck, what do
you think he was going to do with mine? Jesus told us in the
Scriptures that we are to love our neighbor as ourselves. If
we don't love or understand ourselves, how can we love and
understand our neighbor? We need to understand ourselves and
love ourselvs so that we can love others.
We've seen in the scriptures that in order to love
others, we need to love ourselves. But first, we need to love
God. Without love for God, we will not be able to come into
the proper understanding of ourselves in relationship to Him.
understanding yourself should come as a Spirit -natural
result of putting your energy toward loving the Lord God your
creator. As you begin to understand yourself, you will begin
to understand others. You will recognize that you have
weaknesses and strengths and so do others. As a result, you
will learn to tolerate others whom God has made as though
they are quite different than you.
ASSUMPTION 3: According to God's Word, loving yourself is
not selfishness.
ANALOGY 3: Compare it to the relationship between a man
and a wife. The Bible tells us that men
should love their wives. It is God's will for
men to love their wives. If a man loves his
wife, he love shimself.
ASSURANCE 3" "in this same way, husbands ought to love
their wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves
himself." Ephesians 5:28
APPLICATION 3: If a man loves his wife, he loves himself.
It is not wrong to love yourself. If we said it was wrong to
love ourself, we'd have to say it is wrong for a man to love
his wife. You know that isn't right. The Bible correlates the
way a man loves himself to the way he loves his wife. It is
the same thing. This does not indicate selfishness. Love is
an attitude, so loving yourself is having the right attitude
toward yourself so you can have a right attitude toward
others. Men are suppose to love themselves so they are able
to love their wives. When a person develops the right
understanding of themself, it is easier to understand others.
Loving yourself is very important. By lovong yourself, you
will make the road more beautiful for those around you.
ASSUMPTION 4: you will get a lot more done for God if you
have a good opinion of yourself. You must belive in God's
ability to work through you in order to reach others.
I am sure you can think of a number of people whom you
respect in the religious world. They are in a position they
secured by faith. It si because they believed in what God
could do through their faith in Him.
ANALOGY 4: In the book of Numbers, Moses sent ten spies to
scout the land God promised to Israel. Twelve spies wnet out.
Ten of them came back saying, "Man, there is just no way."
But two of them said, "We are able to go up and take the
country God has promised to us!"
The doubting ten came back real dramatic at that point.
Soon they had everyone quaking in their boots. "Man, we can't
go over there. Those guys are giants. They look like the
National Football League combined. There is no way us little
squirts will go over there and take on those giants. They are
huge. We are like grasshoppers next to them."
Joshua and Caleb said, "Man we aren't grasshoppers! God
is on our side. We are able to move in the name of the Lord
and have victory over our enemies. That is what God wants us
to do and we can do it!"
ASSURANCE 4: Listen to this quote from the Bible of the way
the ten spies saw their situation, "We can't attack those
people; they are stronger than we are.' And they spread among
the Israelites a bad report about the land they had explored.
They said, 'The land we explored devours those living in it.
All the people we saw were of great size. We seemed like
grasshoppers in our own eyes and we looked the same to them."
Numbers 13:31-33
APPLICATION 4: Becaue the spies who gave the evil report
did not have a good image of what God could do through them,
they were defeated before teh fight began. Their attitude
displeased God. They didn't even want to try. They were so
convinced of their weakness and inability to do what God told
them to do, that they wouldn't take the first step.
having a poor idea about ourselves and our ability to do
what God directs us to do, diapleases God. In fact, He sent
them out to the wilderness to wander forty years because of
their fears. Not one who had believed the evil report lived
to see the promised land.
ASSUMPTION 5: When you don't have the right attitude about
yourself, you will have a wrong attitude or misconceptions
about ohters, the enemy and God. Let's call this effect the
GRASSHOPPER SYNDROM.
ANALOGY 5: The ten spies are evidenace of this. They had a
misconception of themselves. They thought there was no way
they could take the land God had promised them. That was a
"grasshopper complex." As soon as they estimated themselves
as grasshoppers, they estimated all Israel in the same light.
Everyone was a grasshopper in the sight of the enemy they had
seen. When they told their countrymen about what they had
seen, they passed on their misconceptions of the enemy. They
said that the enemy had overwhelming power. Yet, had the
Israelites gone out to fight, God woul. dhave given them the
victory. He had promised them the land. To the defeat of the
other people, the misconception of themselves resulted in a
misconception of God. They were unable to take the promised
land.
APPLICATION 5: The defeat of the ten spies should prove
that the "Grasshopper Syndrome" is fatal.
ASSUMPTION 6: Joshua and Caleb took a postitive attitude
even after they saw the giants which inhabited the land.
Their attitude was, "Hey, we able!" They agreed with the word
of God which says we can do all things through Christ.
ANALOGY 6: Josh and Cal had the right attitude or concept
of themselves so everything was put in peoper perspective.
Because of this, they had the right concept of others. They
felt that those around them were also able.
They had the right concept of the enemy. They were ready
to blow those boys away - no matter how big they looked.
They had the right concept of God because they were
confident that He would be with them as He said He would.
They believed that God would fight with them to the victory.
APPLICATION 6: That is the way you ought to look at what
lies ahead before you. When you begin to run yourself into
the ground, you are not pleasing GOd. He made you. In order
to progress in your spiritual life, you have to take a
positive attitude toward yourself and your future in God.
In the same way Joshua and Caleb did, you should know
that God loves you - and that He's for you. You should
understand God's ability and recognize that you are able
because HE makes you able. When you understand that, you will
recognize a new strenght in your life. You will have the
power of God at work in you. When you can see that the power
is not you but Jesus Christ, you will dare to trust in God's
ability as well as desire to work through you. When that
happens, you will achieve things you never imagined.
ASSURANCE 6: "I can doo all things through Him that
strenghtens me.
Philippians 4:13
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