STORY OF CREATION -- BUREAUCRATICALLY SPEAKING

	In the beginning, God created heaven and earth.

	He was then faced with a class action lawsuit for failing to
file an environmental impact statement with HEPA (Heavenly Environmental
Protection Agency), an angellically staffed agency dedicated to keeping
the Universe pollution free.

	God was granted a temporary permit for the heavenly portion of
the project, but was issued a cease and desist order on the earthly part,
pending further investigation by HEPA.

	Upon completion of his construction permit application and
environmental impact statement, God appeared before the HEPA Council to
answer questions.

	When asked why he had begun these projects in the first place, he
simply replied that he like to be creative.

	This was not considered adequate reasoning, and he was required
to substantiate it further.

	HEPA was unable to see any practical use for the earth since "the
earth was void and empty, and darkness was upon the face of the deep."

	Then God said:  "Let there be light."

	He should never have brought up this point, since one member of
the Council was active in the Sierrangel Club and immediately protested
asking, "How was the light to be made?  Would there be strip mining?
What about thermal pollution?  Air pollution?"  God explained the light
would come from a huge ball of fire.

	Nobody in the Council really understood this, but it was
provisionally accepted assuming:  (1) There would be no smog or smoke
resulting from ball of fire, (2) a separate burning permit would be
required, and (3) since continuous light would be a waste of energy, it
should be dark at least one-half of the time.

	So God agreed to divide the light and darkness, and he would
call the light, Day, and the darkness, Night.  (The Council expressed
no interest with the in-house semantics.)

	When asked how the earth would be covered, God said, "Let there
be a firmament made amidst the waters; and let it divide the waters from
the waters."

	One ecologically radical Council member accused him of double
talk, but the Council tabled action since God would be required first
to file for a permit from the ABLM (Angelic Bureau of Land Management),
and further would be required to obtain water permits from appropriate
agencies involved.

	The Council asked if there would be only water and firmament,
and God said, "Let the earth bring forth the green herb, as such may
seek, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after its kinds, which may have
seen itself upon the earth."

	Here again, the Council took no formal action since this would
require approval of the Game and Fish Commission coordinated with the
Heavenly Wildlife Federation and Audobongelic Society.

	It appeared everything was in order until God stated he wanted
to complete the project in six days.

	At this time he was advised by the Council that his timing was
completely out of the question... HEPA would require a minimum of 180
days to review the application and environmental impact statement.  Then
there would be the public hearings.

	It would take 10 to 12 months before a permit would be granted.